June 2012
1 post
Discoveries in the BDSM community
I’ve thought a lot about what it is that I don’t like about the BDSM community. On some level, it has always felt connected to something I dislike in a kind of Venn-diagram of communities I call the Geekosphere: that overlapping universe of Neo-Pagans, BDSMers, Burners, Comicon, RenFaire, sci-fi cons, cosplay and the like. Basically anything where a Utilikilt is considered appropriate...
Jun 7th
April 2012
36 posts
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Apr 27th
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Apr 26th
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Apr 25th
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Apr 24th
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Apr 23rd
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Apr 22nd
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Apr 21st
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Apr 20th
San Francisco
Heading out to San Francisco for a couple weeks. Hoping I’ll get a chance to sneak away and enjoy some of the city’s famous sex spots, like Eros or Blow Buddies (where I once had a lovely evening getting fucked in a sling). We shall see!
Apr 19th
Apr 19th
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Apr 18th
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Apr 17th
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OMing OMG
Yesterday I had my first experience of orgasmic meditation, or OMing, as it’s known. It’s a technique developed in the One Taste community, and at its most basic, it’s a fifteen-minute practice in which a man uses his index finger to stimulate a woman’s clitoris. The session yesterday was held in my apartment and led by the woman I’ve taken as a life coach, C, along...
Apr 16th
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Apr 16th
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Apr 15th
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Apr 14th
Apr 13th
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Weekend roundup
Happy Friday! What’s on tap for this weekend: Friday night: Tatiana Plus at The Triad Saturday night: Date night at Croton Lounge Nuts & Bolts Party Sunday: Persian Parade Sunday afternoon: Orgasmic meditation (more on that later) Sunday night: Kinky Seder + After-party
Apr 13th
1 tag
Homework, Day 1
Yesterday was Day 1 of my life coaching homework to compliment six women a day. I did it. I told four different women at work that I liked some article of clothing they were wearing. The harder part was out on the street, being bolder. I passed on a few good opportunities out of nervousness, but then I approached a woman who was sitting on the Post Office steps near Penn Station, holding an NYC...
Apr 13th
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Apr 13th
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Out of the blue
Back in the fall, I briefly dated a West African woman. She was bright, funny, gorgeous. She also had family to take care of and a lot that she was dealing with. Things were going great — the last time I saw her, she gave me a blowjob, declared that there would be more where that came from if I treated her nicely, and slept over. And then she disappeared on me: stopped answering texts and...
Apr 12th
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Apr 12th
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Apr 12th
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You look delicious in that sweater
It’s fascinating what I can feel guilty about.  At various times, I’ve felt guilt and/or shame about being bisexual, being poly, wanting lots of sex, being into BDSM, being divorced, being overweight. I’ve done lots of work on these issues, especially in the past year. I’ve lost over thirty pounds on WeightWatchers, bought stylish new clothes, read How to Succeed with...
Apr 12th
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Apr 12th
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Apr 12th
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Flirting by text
One thing I’m discovering is the power of flirtatious texts (or emails, for those who still do that sort of thing).  For example, when a woman I’m interested in invited me out to an ecstatic dance event at a yoga studio, instead of just saying yes — I wasn’t sure about it, but figured I ought to take her up on the direct invitation out on a Saturday night — I sent...
Apr 11th
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Apr 11th
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Apr 11th
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Scarfing
So how best to wear a scarf? Scarves on men seem to be the thing this spring, but is it really OK to wear one with short sleeves? I’ve tried once or twice, and I always feel like a bit of a douche wearing just the scarf and the shirt — even a long-sleeve shirt.  What do you think? Are scarves a good way to go for men? Do you inevitably end up looking gay if you’re wearing your...
Apr 11th
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Apr 11th
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Things to do: The 7th Annual KinkyJews Chocolate... →
On April 15, celebrate a post-Passover chocolate Seder infused with sugar, humor and hedonism — all while maintaining the key elements of the holiday traditions. Followed by a fetish party.
Apr 10th
1 tag
Apr 10th
Photos and days of the week
I’m contemplating photos and days of the week: Bi Mondays Babe Tuesdays Hunk Wednesdays Kink Thursdays Asian Fridays Weekends will hopefully be too busy with actual action to waste posting photos.
Apr 10th
3 tags
Putting it out there
And so here I am, a bi guy in New York City, trying to get along in a complicated sexual universe. I’m also into BDSM, exploring various other forms of alternative sexuality, moderately obsessed (is that a thing?) with fashion, a devoted believer in Weight Watchers, passionate about art and culture, fanatical about the New York Giants, a music nerd, and frighteningly well versed on Asian...
Apr 10th
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Apr 10th
1 note